Apprenticeship

Apprenticeship
03-06-05

In 2005 my life has been dominated by singing in Orthodox services in the Republic of Georgia. Who could have guessed? What leads a decision, an action, why do we find ourselves in certain places at certain times involved in activities seemingly so arbitrary? Do we dream our futures, imagine them, plan them, or is the future solely based on the decisions we are capable of making in any single moment of the present time/space? The future is not worth thinking about. But thinking of the past as a series of future moments amuses me. I like to wonder what guides a decision, an action, an event. How many people’s lives are effected by a decision I make, and mine by the decisions made by people around me? To even imagine that we are independent of each other breaks down quickly. We are bound together, a thread of destiny weaves our lives together. The best decision making process I’ve found for myself is passive-active: passive in that I submit to the intuitive circumstantial path that seems to keep unfolding the carpet of life before me, and active in that within this framework I try to do everything possible to keep my options and doors open, and to pursue my activities with intent, though I might not know the true purpose in this moment.

Take Georgian chants. And why not Greek or Russian chants, Tibetan, Native American, or Hindi chants for that matter? But Georgian chants. I can’t really explain deeply what I’m doing here. But I am here, and this seems to be the right place. I seem to have the interests and skills to be doing exactly this study, uncanny though it always seems to me. One day perhaps I’ll understand in retrospect, but for now, I blindly plow ahead, imagining myself to be on some type of destiny from somewhere, towards something.... and I live life day to day.

I have finished another marathon weekend of singing. Sigh, cough. Thankfully, sleep awaits.

I have two interesting trios that I sing with. Luarsab and Ladi are professional singers but neither extremely religious. Services have recently begun daily in the Sameba Cathedral, we are the choir for the Friday Vespers-Saturday morning Divine Liturgy services. But the Cathedral does not have a regular attendance, the space is too massive, the sound systems horrendous. This all combines to make for a strange, oft-times non-religious feeling atmosphere, complemented nicely by Luarsab’s absolute disorganization of the service chants. However, when we do get around to singing the right thing at the right time, we sound fantastic.

Saturdays I have time for lunch with Luarsab where I am able to forgive him for being what I consider unprofessional in service, then I have to race off to my afternoon services at the little unfinished Jvartan Maghleba church. I sing here with two untrained but cool young guys, collectively under the tyranical rule of our director Antonina. Here is a sweet little passive-aggressive lady who is uber organized and spends her spare moments nagging us to no end. She conducts with a jerky upward-downward waving of the hand, and frantically tugs on Josep’s coat when he sings a note slightly wrong.

My main gifts of this season have been singing these gorgeous chants in their correct context; my main challenge has been putting up with my two directors!

But this is my apprenticeship. I have to learn the simple chants before the complex. I have to learn the liturgical cycle, the order and meaning of the chants.

Reading music is like second nature to me now, and actually prevents me from memorizing the music as I need to, similar to simply reading a play over and over instead of trying to learn a small speech by heart. So I have created word sheets and made up my own little notation system to try to help myself learn the chants by heart without the crutch of having the written music.